I have heard that question more this year, 2025, than throughout the rest of my life. I do not truly understand it. If there is something to care about, why are we ignoring it?
I find it to be a strange question. Growing up, we were taught right is right, wrong is wrong, and fair is fair. Hearing that phrase, or a version just like it always makes me pause; something about it does not feel right.
It can almost be seen as a stance of self-protection. I understand the impulse. I do not understand how anyone believes it ends there.
Personally, I adore options. When offered too many, I falter. Choices are easy, just pick one. Decisions are difficult because they involve living with the consequences, and that asks for a deeper kind of thought.
If we were to follow that logic deeper, delayed decisions then become choices of inaction. That confuses me as well. We all enjoy free will. We all enjoy making decisions for, well, everyone actually: self, family as a unit, friends hanging out, others at work.
Sometimes it feels like the choice is between growth and stagnation. I am not sure that is the whole picture, but it is where I keep getting stuck. I want to believe discomfort is a signal toward growth. I am less sure what happens when we ignore it.
My first experience with the homeless, working in the city of Chicago, I pretended not to see them as that is what I noticed others around me doing. Very puzzling as I was young, but it was the accepted norm; if it does not affect you, walk away. Speaking up was too costly. It was easier to follow along than to stand up and seek attention.
I still do not know what I was protecting by looking away. I only know that it cost me something to learn how.
Shying away from a decision involves discomfort.
I understand the impulse to avoid it.
I am still sitting with what it costs.